• My Family

    Blessed by the Lord for the Joy of family!!

  • Rachel’s Daily Cystic Fibrosis Medications

    Albuterol (2-4 x)
    Hypertonic (2x)
    Pulmozyme (1x)
    Glutathione Inhaled (2x)
    Advair (2x)
    Prevacid (2X)
    Ursodial (2x)
    Glutathione oral (3x)
    L-Arginine (1x)
    Acidophilus (3x)
    Vitamin (2x)
    Periactin (2x)
    vitamin d3 (1x)
    Cal/Magnesium blend (1x)
    ADEK (1x M,W,F)
    Creon 12 (6 with meals and snacks)
    Vest (2-3x) 30 minutes
    Percussion (30 minutes)
    alpha lipoid acid (1x)
    singulair (1x)
    fish oil (1x)
    nasonex (1x)
    zyrtec (1x)
    azithromyicin (M, W, F)

  • Recent Posts

  • Monthly Archives

Birthday Celebration

What a fun (ny) cake. My sweet Caleb made this for me. Notice there is the # 34 followed by 5 other candles in front. Then 4 in the back so that all the kids could help blow out one. CRACKED ME UP!

Thankful for sweet friends that shared their time and love with me on my birthday. I am blessed for sure.

My sweet kiddos.

 

It has been an interesting couple of weeks around here.  For some reason, around my birthday I seem to be the most emotional time of the year.   I just celebrated my birthday on Monday.  The last four birthday’s have been extremely difficult days for me.  I have no problem getting older…kinda think it is funny because most times I can not even remember HOW old I really am.  The issue the last four year is in the loosing of my dear mother.  There is something about a loving mother’s presence.  She was amazing!  (It breaks my heart that some can not relate to my feelings and emotions that I so easily had for my mother due to strained relationships.)  However, there was no straining with my mom.  She cheered, adored and delighted in her children and grandchildren.  It was her honor and pleasure to pray for and encourage each one of us as often as she could.  So, in her absence each year, it is a stark reminder of what has been lost.

The birthday celebration is so much more than gifts or accolades.  It is about cherishing a person.  If any of you have been around me in the last few weeks, sorry for the rush of emotions.  Not having my mama with me daily to traverse this life has been hard.  Somedays, even 3 years and four months later, it feels like the loss of my mom has only dulled a smidge.  The pain is still there.  The tears still right on the surface.  The chasm of loss so deep.  My birthday is a reminder of that fact.  A parent, and in my case, a mom, is the only one that has been with you from the day you were born.  There is something so precious about that loving relationship, those memories, and the connection.

This year, the actual birthday was a bit different.  I did cry in anticipation of my day for several days/weeks in advance.  There is so much lost in death here on earth.  Not only the daily time and communication with the person, but the history of life, and the loss of the future memories.  The history hits me every year.  There are so many questions that I wish I could still ask her.  My kids often ask me about things and I have slowly come to the reality that I don’t know, and will never again have that opportunity.  (Where did you live when you were born, how did your mom get to the hospital, who came to visit you??? and countless others.)  But, overall its the deep ache of missing someone that was connected to you in all ways.  The realization that it is me alone to carry on much of her memory.  The missed opportunities for my children to know such an amazing, Godly, woman are some of the hardest.

Anyway, all these emotions were present again this year.  However, this year I had the joy of leading someone to Christ the day before my birthday.  So amazing!!  So uplifting.  A reminder that this world is not our home, and that there is something so much greater.  While I know that to be true everyday…it was inspiring.  My birthday was able to come and go without the same sadness.  Although I do and will continue to miss my sweet mama in more ways than the average can probably ever comprehend, the joy of knowing that God used me to speak the words to another soul that impact eternity was awesome!!  In fact I was on such a high the morning after my birthday, that there were no tears of sadness.  I spent the morning praising the Lord for His mercies and goodness with my children.  Songs that I often sat around the table/piano/car singing with my mom.  Two highlighted songs, There is Victory In Jesus, and I don’t Know About Tomorrow.  Check out the lyrics below.  We were all singing them with our loudest voices (bless my kids, they don’t hold their ears when I sing =) yet).

So funny how perspective changes everything. I am grateful to the Lord for His tender mercies.  I am thankful for wonderful friends (sweet friends brought me a candy bouquet and balloons <3)   and family.  But the thing that I am the most thankful for is the fact that I know my Savor lives.  The struggles of this life…are only light and momentary and that someday I will be with Him forever.  No tears, no sadness, no sickness, and joy ever more with my King…for me…that is the most awesome thing I can think of!

 

Victory In Jesus

I heard an old, old story,
How a Savior came from glory,
How He gave His life on Calvary
To save a wretch like me;
I heard about His groaning,
Of His precious blood’s atoning,
Then I repented of my sins
And won the victory.

Chorus
O victory in Jesus,
My Savior, forever.
He sought me and bought me
With His redeeming blood;
He loved me ere I knew Him
And all my love is due Him,
He plunged me to victory,
Beneath the cleansing flood.

I heard about His healing,
Of His cleansing pow’r revealing.
How He made the lame to walk again
And caused the blind to see;
And then I cried, “Dear Jesus,
Come and heal my broken spirit,”
And somehow Jesus came and bro’t
To me the victory.

Chorus
O victory in Jesus,
My Savior, forever.
He sought me and bought me
With His redeeming blood;
He loved me ere I knew Him
And all my love is due Him,
He plunged me to victory,
Beneath the cleansing flood.

I heard about a mansion
He has built for me in glory.
And I heard about the streets of gold
Beyond the crystal sea;
About the angels singing,
And the old redemption story,
And some sweet day I’ll sing up there
The song of victory.

Chorus
O victory in Jesus,
My Savior, forever.
He sought me and bought me
With His redeeming blood;
He loved me ere I knew Him
And all my love is due Him,
He plunged me to victory,
Beneath the cleansing flood.

I Don’t Know About Tomorrow

I don’t know about tomorrow,
I just live from day to day.
I don’t borrow from it’s sunshine,
For it’s skies may turn to gray.
I don’t worry o’er the future,
For I know what Jesus said,
And today I’ll walk beside Him,
For He knows what is ahead.

Many things about tomorrow,
I don’t seem to understand;
But I know Who holds tomorrow,
And I know Who holds my hand.

Ev’ry step is getting brighter,
As the golden stairs I climb;
Ev’ry burden’s getting lighter;
Ev’ry cloud is silver lined.
There the sun is always shining,
There no tear will dim the eyes,
At the ending of the rainbow,
Where the mountains touch the sky.

Many things about tomorrow,
I don’t seem to understand;
But I know Who holds tomorrow,
And I know Who holds my hand.

I don’t know about tomorrow,
It may bring me poverty;
But the One Who feeds the sparrow,
Is the One Who stands by me.
And the path that be my portion,
May be through the flame or flood,
But His presence goes before me,
And I’m covered with His blood.

Many things about tomorrow,
I don’t seem to understand;
But I know Who holds tomorrow,
And I know Who holds my hand.

Advertisements

2 Responses

  1. Love and Birthday blessings to you, Tiffany! My heart was right there in agreement with you as I read your blog. We recently celebrated both of my children’s birthdays and my niece’s all for the first time without my dad. His absence has left such a huge hole for our family. Though the kids still had great birthdays, it was hard. Soon we have more birthdays coming including mine and my sister’s (not to mention the holidays). I’m not looking forward to it, but yet I “rejoice in the hope of the glory of God. Not only so, but we also rejoice in our sufferings because suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not disappoint us because God has poured out His love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit whom He has given us.” (Romans 5) Thanks for sharing your heart!

    • Thanks Jennifer. I know that you do understand the heavy heart at having lost your dear father. Life is so very precious. I pray that as the holidays approach you will rest on the goodness of the Lord. All of the first’s are so hard (and for me even the 3rd’s and 4th’s I guess. =).

      Praying for you, friend! Thanks again for taking the time to comment.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: